You are my sunshine

Tags

adventure, Canada, challenges, Holidays, Home, Hot chocolate, memories, New York, nostalgic, Seasonal affective disorder, seasons, Summer, travel, Weather

“Baby, it’s cold outside.” I always associated that song with christmas, even though they’re just remarking the weather conditions.”

“But summer is no more. Hearing the song on the radio after the temperature dropped to a freakin cold 6 degrees. Time to buckle up for my first Canadian winter (I know autumn is coming first, but with the stories I’ve heard…)”

“I enjoyed my New York minute. I wanted to go in september to profit of the known Indian Summer. Instead I got full on summer! Ow, how good it was to absorb the vitamin D like a sponge.”

“Now it’s back to wearing layers of sweaters and vests, lots of socks and practical, but ugly shoes. No quick groceries run without putting on the winter proof attire, instead of shorts and flip flops. Me and my coat will be inseparable”

I wrote the paragraphs above 2 weeks ago. I hadn’t come around editing it into a nice story. But that didn’t seem necessary after all. Because tonight I am going to a barbecue. Yes, a barbecue. When the temperature got down to an icy 6 degrees one morning, I saw my hopes for an Indian Summer fading away, together with the warm sunrays.

But the last week the temperature jumped to a surprising 24 degrees. Everybody cherished the cosy september sun, the colourful leaves on the trees and the brown leaves of autumn on the ground, which set the scenery for a corny novel. I can’t wait what the writer has in store next…

Back to reality

Tags

adventure, Beer, Birthday, Brewery, cultures, Emotion, entertainment, friends, Happiness, Holidays, memories, New York, regret, travel

Her face is smudged with foundation that gives her an orange glow and only emphasizes her age. The creamy substance lumps in the fine wrinkles next to her heavy smokey eyes. Her top is cut just a little bit too low and shows a cleavage pushed up to her collarbone. The tight top not only accentuates her boobs, but also her muffintop. She is really nice though. She gives me and my friend, slightly tipsy, advice on where to go while we are in New York.

I met the nice lady in the Brooklyn Brewery, where I put my skilled taste buds to the test with some delicious beers. The brewery is based in an industrial hall, with long wooden picnic tables, which encourages the merrymakers to talk to strangers, a beer in hand and a slice of Brooklyn pizza in the other. We found ourselves, Brooklyn Oktoberfest beer in hand, talking with neighbouring women. The four women , were born and raised New Yorkers and proud to be. They reminded me of the four famous gals from Sex and the City, if it wasn’t reality kicking in.

The woman I was talking to most, let’s call her Samantha, looked pretty and sparkling, but from up close, you could see she was trying too hard. Her conversational skills were superficial and made her look immature, or maybe even overmature-midlifecrises-kinda-style. She tried to fit in with her slightly younger friends, but when she started talking about the upcoming Woodstock festival her friends faces drew blank.

I felt sorry for her. I am sure she herself and her close friends consider themselves glamorous, interesting, succesful and maybe even happy persons. But then I caught her. She was letting her guard down when she thought nobody was watching. I think, when she looks at herself in the mirror at night, after washing the layers of make up and the city of her face, there is a middle-aged, lonely woman left.

I don’t know if it is New York City that does this to her or if it’s her life choices. And I don’t know if its New York City that makes people unhappy or if it’s their life choices, but not that many people smile, at least, no sincere smiles. For me, this meeting, was a wake up call. Whining about turning 25, seems like such an insignificant action, while I have lots to be happy about. New York, you ain’t dragging me down!

Inspiration overkill

Tags

adventure, Emotion, memories, New York, nostalgic, travel

My first visit to New York is a fact! We arrived at 7am with a night bus. At dawn I had my first view on the o-so known Manhattan skyline. My heart skipped a beat of pure happiness, dropped of astonishment and then found its normal rythm again. I was surprised how small the Empire State Building looked like, but right away I felt reassured.

Reassured that it’s not a big scary city. Don’t get me wrong, it IS a big city, but for some reason I didn’t feel attacked by the unknown grandeur. Maybe because I have visited the city before. Through movies and shows nonetheless.

Being back home, safe and sound, I’m organising my writings. It’s a blur of thoughts, observations and memories. This city sure gets you thinking. Let me get back to you…

Longings to leave the bubble

Tags

adventure, challenges, desires, Emotion, longings, new job, New York, Paris

Every year I do a marathon of some of my favorite shows: sex and the city, Gossip Girl, Friends, How I met you mother, Californication,  New girl, etc. Just the first 4 shows alone are all based in New York. So seeing the smooth surfaces of the skyscrapers, the millions of lights and the excitement everywhere, I get that feeling.

That feeling is very hard to describe, and for me, it is actually the same feeling as fear, falling in love and desire, just to mention a few emotions. But for some reason, I do know to separate them from one another.

I can only describe that feeling as butterflies in my stomach. With a happy emotion it’s a warm feeling, with a negative emotion, like being nervous for a job interview, it’s like the butterflies are all tangled up with their wings, trying to escape from what’s to come.

The rush of the butterflies always inspires and motivates me to take a closer look at the emotion that I have just experienced. Though I have never been to New York I get a warm feeling by seeing the big apple. Living in Paris now for almost 2 years, makes it feel like a village sometimes. Or in Paris’ case, several small villages. Still, there is exhilaration around every corner.  But I can’t seem to escape the feeling of wanting to live in another big city with new unknown exhilaration.

In my case, New York is just a catalyst to shake up my comfy bubble. When I stay to long in my comfort zone, I get restless. This feeling only motivates me more, to start looking for a new challenge.

On the contrary, I sometimes get an urge for stability. To find a nice place to live, with your own furniture, with decent kitchen supplies, a place to put all your books, instead of leaving them at the parents’ house each time you visit. But still this rare feeling doesn’t weigh up to all the benefits of my life possibilities right now. So the house with garden, boyfriend, dog, big kitchen and a lot of books, can wait for a few years.

Right now, I’m going to focus on finding a job in an English-speaking country. I’m ready for a new adventure. Any ideas?